“We cannot have Uncommunicated Expectations.” Dana Blackwood
Heard an AMZING quote this week. My newest client and long time friend, Dana Blackwood, (Blackwood Contracting, Inc. http://www.blackwoodcontractinginc.com/) Shared at our coaching session on Wednesday that the biggest challenge is holding people accountable for Uncommunicated Expectations. WOW! There is an entire book to unpack on this topic.
One of the biggest challenges I see is the frustration that builds as we continue to watch our spouse, our children, our coworker, or our direct reports, not doing things the way that they should. They don’t seem to get it. They don’t seem to understand the importance or the impact. “What is wrong with them” we ask, sometimes in anger. They should know by now. It is their job. We already talked about this. Ever heard these statements? Ever said these types of statements? Ever had theses very frustrating feelings? What is happening?
Uncommunicated Expectations. We ASSUME. It is one of the biggest challenges, and takes an intentional focus on change over time to overcome. We filter the world around us through us. How would we do it. How we did it when we were in their position. How hard we worked. How much we were able to get done. Hold on, is this about us or them? Seven Habits of Highly Effective People has a chapter that challenges us to “Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood”. Does this person know what is expected? Do they have a clear job description? Do they know what is required to do the job well? Do they know what they are responsible and accountable for? Do they know when they are Winning? What great results look like? What ownership they have been given to achieve the results? In most cases in my journey the answer to almost all of these questions is no. No wonder we are frustrated. But, they are frustrated as well. Most of us would love to do a good job. Would love to be knocking it out of the park. The biggest influence I usually see is fear. Fear they will get it wrong. Fear they can’t do it like me. Fear they don’t care as much as I do. Fear we will lose the deal or the client. Fear of not being needed or not having anything to do. Fear is the opposing voice of growth and progress.
So Bobby, what do we do? Glad you asked. Let’s spend a few moments getting ready. Planning. Clarifying what needs to be done. Clarifying what we want the results to be. Clarifying what amount of time we are giving them to get the job done. Clarifying how much ownership and empowerment we are giving away to get the results we want. Let’s make sure we are all on the same page. “Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood.” You got this. It will take some time to learn to trust and empower but it will definitely be the catalyst to take you from Good to Great. (Great book by Jim Collins https://www.jimcollins.com/books.html)
If you need some coaching on how to make this transition, let me know. bmink@choiceconsultingman.com
Clarity, my new book coming this fall. (https://www.choiceconsultingman.com/clarity/)